Wednesday, November 09, 2005

Music at work

My feelings on the subject are these:

If you work in an office with many people than either play something so mind numbingly boring that your brain simply absorbs it and then dumps as quickly as possible or don't play anything at all. Case in point. Take my new job for instance. All I could find to work in was as a clinic asst. at my son's elementary school. Me, a degreed professional, is now making less than the poverty limit. Thank you very much Mr. Bush for your #$%&* No Child Left Behind *%^&*@# legislation and those !@$%&* tests teachers now have to take. But I digress. The school nurse that I work under is actually a very nice lady. A very nice, wholesome, Christian lady. And very nice Christian people love listening to Christian music. And then other very nice, holy-rolling, wholesome Christian people who walk through the clinic prick their ears up when they hear Jesus being praised in song, can you give me a halleluja! And then these people bring in their cd's of Christian Praise and Worship music that has made the rounds in the whole church, in the families, and is now spreading like an oil slick out into the working world.

It never ceases to amaze me how these nice people then turn around, look you straight in the face, with these huge grins on their faces and ask you like eager beavers "Don't you just love this?" I stand there with my jaw slightly dropped and my teeth clenched. I don't want to offend anyone so I try very hard to smile and simply say "It's oaky." Listen up all of you nice, wholesome, Christian people. I have nothing against what you believe, how you believe, and how much you love the Lord. I am a deeply spiritual person and I love the Lord too. But Praise and Worship music grates on my ears like sandpaper being rubbed over the hood of a car. I absolutely hate it. More boring music this world has never seen. Even the Catholic litanies and songs sung in the original latin at mass have more feeling than these cookie-cutter songs. And then they bring it to work, where my heathen ears have to listen to it, and I swear I burn as if holy water had been dripped on my forehead. Why do Christians assume that everybody is into this music? And why do they have to bring it out into the work-place? Do I go jamming 50-cent into Mass on Sundays? NO. And I don't expect to hear all this bland music where I work. It's hard enough getting through the day without adding the extra torture of listening to something I utterly detest. But I am a sly one. As soon as the nurse goes away I shut it off. When she returns I play dumb and say the cd finished. I think they're beginning to catch on. They must be scratching their heads thinking, "Gee, I could swear this cd is a lot longer."

I have my own style of music that I love. I am not about to bring it where I work because I know not everyone will like it. So there. Keep your music in your own house or in your car. One day when you become master of the universe and we are all your slaves then torture us with bad music. Until that time though, keep the Praise and Worship at home. Preferably buried under a pile of moldy laundry in the dank basement.

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